Fenimore Cooper's Literary Offences

In this lively essay, a celebrated humorist turns his pen on one of America’s most praised frontier writers, whose novel of a woodsman and his companions has earned lofty accolades from professors and abroad. The narrator questions how such praise could arise from those who have never actually read the books, and sets the stage for a tongue‑in‑cheek forensic examination. With a blend of wit and scholarly mock‑seriousness, the piece invites listeners to reconsider the thin line between artistic reverence and blind admiration.

The heart of the work is a catalog of nineteen (or twenty‑two) rules that any romantic adventure ought to obey, followed by a meticulous tally of how the author flagrantly violates each one. From episodes that wander without purpose to dialogue that sounds bafflingly out of place, the critique reads like a courtroom testimony against literary missteps. Yet the tone remains playful, as the author uses exaggerated counts and faux‑legal language to both entertain and provoke thought about what truly makes a story work.