
EUROPE REVISED - By Irvin S. Cobb
To My Small Daughter Who bade me shed a tear at the tomb of Napoleon, which I was very glad to do, because when I got there my feet certainly were hurting me.
Chapter I. We Are Going Away From Here - Foreword.
Chapter II. My Bonny Lies over the Ocean—Lies and Lies and Lies
Chapter III. Bathing Oneself on the Other Side
Chapter IV. Jacques, the Forsaken
Chapter V. When the Seven A.M. Tut-tut leaves for Anywhere
Chapter VI. La Belle France Being the First Stop
Chapter VII. Thence On and On to Verbotenland
Chapter VIII. A Tale of a String-bean
A delightfully off‑beat travelogue, this book reimagines the guidebook as a witty, self‑aware companion rather than a dry compendium of facts. From the moment the narrator steps aboard a bustling steamer, the narrative swirls with humorous observations about seasickness, crowded decks, and the absurdity of saying goodbye to loved ones while wrestling with oversized luggage. The author’s playful dig at traditional travel manuals—filled with endless statistics—sets a lively tone that invites listeners to laugh at the quirks of wanderlust.
As the ship pulls away, the narrator’s voice turns to the sea itself, treating it as a character with “habits and peculiarities” and introducing a cast of eccentric passengers, each clutching messages for distant relatives. Along the way, witty footnotes and cheeky asides (including a lament about an unflattering illustration) pepper the story, promising a charming mix of travel anecdotes, gentle satire, and the occasional philosophical musing—all delivered with a warm, conversational flair.
Language
en
Duration
~8 hours (513K characters)
Publisher of text edition
Project Gutenberg
Credits
Text file produced by Kirk Pearson with help from the Volunteers at The Distributed Proofreaders HTML file produced by David Widger
Release date
2003-10-01
Rights
Public domain in the USA.
Subjects

1876–1944
Best remembered for his warm humor and sharp eye for American life, this Kentucky-born writer moved from newspaper reporting into a hugely popular career as an author, columnist, and entertainer. His stories often mix small-town detail, comic timing, and a reporter’s feel for character.
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